I've decided.. From now on, i'll keep my feelings and emotions aside.
Nid to concentrate on:
1. studies
2. frisbee
3. not getting hurt
I dun wan to put to much feelings into something and then get hurt on my way out. I've been through that many times..
Now i understand how Cloud felt when Zack and Aeris died.. I'd like to be like Cloud, not becoz its cool or yeng, but it avoids me from taking responsibilities on emotions. Both mine and others.. Haiz...
TO BE OR NOT TO BE??
1. Tag victim has to come up with 8 different points about his/her perfect lover.
2. Have to mention the gender of his/her perfect lover.
3. Tag 8 other victims to join this game and leave a comment on their blog. Points about the special 'person'.
8 points? fine, let me try ar...
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1. she must be like Yuna.
Innocent, and reliable.
2. she must love me.
Obviously??
3. she has to be nice.
Abaden??
4. must love music. Jap music too.
Just like me.. Hehe..
5. she has to be caring n loves kids.
Coz tat's de basic for starting a family rite??
6. doesn't have to be very pretty.
To me heart counts as number 1..
7. must not be malay or indian..
I'm not a racist... Just tat i dun fancy malay or indian's tradition's n culture.. I respect but not ready to indulge in it..
8. I deno anything else to say. i'll just stress out again lor. SHE MUST BE LIKE YUNA!!
coz i love yuna too much.... ^^
let me see, i wan to tag.....
Xin Lin, Kevang, Jie Yi, Josephine (my cuz), Ralyn... Tat's all so far..
1. Each blogger starts with eight random facts/habits about themselves. 2. Bloggers that are tagged need to write on their own blog about their eight things and post these rules.
3. At the end of your blog, you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their names.
4. Don't forget to leave them a comment telling them they've been tagged and to read your blog.
fact #1 I dun like Mushrooms...
No one noes, well exep for my sis la.. I tend vomit after taking mushrooms. It's not like i'm allergic, mayb i'm just immune to it...
fact #2 I love Yuna.
She's a character from FFX.. But if i ever find such a person in real life.. She's mine...
fact #3 I miss my 2 Kai Muis..
1. dun get de wrong idea ya.. It's been long since i chatted with her.. She ignores me or rather avoids me nowadays.
2. 2nd kai mui, haha, nth much to miss lar... Sms her veli often. She's a good cure for all my mental stresses.. XD
fact #4 I love music..
I cannot go anywhere without music. Never without my handphone or mp3 player. I need music 24/7, even while sleepin i leave de radio on till i wake up.
fact #5 I use vulgar words often.
I dun reli like it. I mix around wif so many adults in basketball n soccer. Eventually i tok like them, which isn't nice. I'm changing...
fact #6 I love image editting.
Yes, i love to edit images n create beautiful images.. Gives me great satisfaction.
fact #7 My fav number is 7. (din noe same as Louise's)
Well, as long as any number has a factor of 7 i love it.. Especially 21, since its my b'day...
fact #8 I'm shy and quiet.
A few might remind me of Restaurant Tomato from Langkawi. But truth is, i'm shy n silent by nature. I rarely tok outside of skul. I just like to listen to music n keep my mouth shut...
I'll just tag a few people..
Xin Lin, Kevang, Irene... I deno who else, not many ppl read my blog anyway...
Recently, I finally get the much needed rest... 2 days off without library work and stuff and no stress.. No need to see Biggy Fatty too. What a relief..
But i still have a few probs.
1. Sound for presentation - redo
2. Multimedia Room - clean up
3. Games in Library comp - delete aka uninstall
A Ketua Multimedia's work is never done...
Anyway enough of that.
I'm very curious. What has happened to my love life? My friend asked.
Well, I really don't know. Haven't thought about it for a long while. He thought I was joking or trying to be hilarious.
I reasoned with him, saying that I'm just trying to find the Yuna in my life...
"Good luck!" He said, with a sinister smile..
"I believe that she'll appear.. One way or another. Good luck with that evil witch dude.."
You know who I'm talking about, rite? ****
AXCELLOR!!
The last day of YE (Young Enterprising) was today. At 7.30am, we traveled to Kuala Lumpur by bus. Today was also the award-giving day. We were all very excited and nervous. There was no idea who would've won.
Once we reached there, Axcellor Enterprise, which is us, placed our bags in the hall room and went exploring. The bad part was it was still early, they were barely opened. So we did not get to see much though. All we managed to do was reach the 18 Floor and a floor called Mezz (M).
Don't ask me why. I never knew that the 18th floor was a revolving restaurant. Too bad we didn't get to revolve around it. Or my team mates would have gone ballistic. Haha. True though.
Once the ceremony started at 9.30am, participants, or rather young entrepreneurs were gathered in the huge glamorous hall. Everything went quiet when the speech was given. Three men, (two ang mo kia and one ranjit singh) gave separate yet innovative speeches. They were admirable and unforgettable. But that wasn't the interesting part.
Next, the prizes were given. We won 2 prizes out of 5. Not first placing though. And 1 more prize for best entrepreneur of the company. We were 2nd runner up with Best Annual Report and 1st Runner Up with Best Use of ICT ( I'm so proud, I did it after all..) Haha... ^^ Then, Choon Lim won the best entrepreneur for Axcellor. Congrats guys..!! XD Great work!!
I was proud, after all that hard work, we came in 2nd for ICT, the highest prized of all the prizes we had. In the end, Dureka from SMK Damansara Utama was the school that totally owned every other school. About 5 to 6 awards involved them. Congrats Dureka!! You guys did a great job!! : )
After the ceremony, we had buffet.. Just right on the ground floor of the Federal Hotel itself. Wow, we sure had a lot. Trust me. We had mutton, beef, chicken, muffles, squid, rice, fried rice, ais kacang, cendol, ice-cream, and lovely, colorful deserts (you must try)... You have no idea how pain our stomach were. Not because of the food. But something else. Well, just the few of us. 
We were eating and I sat near Ee Lynn, Jie Yi, Choon Lim and Hua Yen. These four represent the 4 GODS. Ee Lynn, Creativity Goddess, Jie Yi, Zi Lian Goddess, Choon Lim, PoPo Goddess and Hua Yen, Goddess of Dirtiness. Throughout the whole meal, we cracked jokes and laughed so loud that the Manager of the Hotel asked us to be silent. Twice! Haha. We totally went crazy. I really enjoyed it, round after round of food, sharing of ideas and taste, laughing at each other. Everything was wild.
And then, Hua Yen cracked the funniest joke I've heard so far. After many rounds, Hua Yen could still go on eating. We asked her how she could finish so much. And then she replied, "Eating leh, veli easy. But to eat a lot, it depends on STAMINA wan!"
For that word on, everyone felt very zadao... No one could resist laughing. It was contagious and fatal. Neverending. Imagine laughing loud on a full stomach. We still laughed on while holding our stomach with our hands. It ached badly, but still the fun goes on.. ^^
And then, the most zadao thing happened. After my gang finished our deserts, we looked on as Cindy and Xin Lin went on for more servings. These were probably their 10th or 11th round. Oh my god. Haha... These two were skinnier than Hua Yen, yet they outlasted her. Then came back the topic: STAMINA.. Ha ha.
After the meal, the advisors were given some token of appreciation. Next, we took many, many weird pictures with the advisers and fellow achievers. What a waste that this is the end of Axcellor. Even though we didn't win much like last year, I still love my gang. I love you guys... My fellow, dear Axcellor-mates.
I really miss everyone. Don't think we'll have such a chance to work as a team again in the future. From then on, we separated, each with their own thoughts and feelings and assumptions. None bad. Axcellor ends now? Officially? No! Never!
I hope to see them or keep in touch with them till I die...
LONG LIVE AXCELLOR!!
Holiday has started. But not for ME, I guess. It's been a while since I've enjoyed my year-end holidays. Everyday, well, most days, I have to pain my head thinking of ways and ideas to solve and conquer the problems given by the Big Fat Itch.
For every single day that I'm in the library, for every fifteen minutes, she summons me. For meaningless reasons. To help her print, to help her bind stuff. Those useless stuff. She always asks people to do these when they have other things to do. I had my Taklimat Presentation. Now look what she did. I did not manage to finish 50% at all...
I'm very frustrated now.
In the library, only seeing a few people eases the tension in my brain. For instance, my forever-love-sitting-on-the-floor-reading sister, Louise, Kia Wee (coz she calls him more when he's around), Choon Hiang ( Always chats about football or frisbee, tension breaker), Jia Da ( never serious, fun at times and not when time's not right), and others as well... Away from library, I feel free like a bird... NOT!! She's such a Itch in the ass at times... Well, every single TIME!!
Somebody, help me. Anyone? Please??
- Recently I've been damn busy.. With the Taklimat Pusat Sumber that's been taking it's toll on my sleeping hours and energy.
- Everytime I think I'm closer to finishing it, teacher comes in and changes every single thing. Which she does it everytime she sees it. The best part is she tells you bit by bit. Not in one shot..
- Seriously, I feel like stranggling her at times...
- No time for friends, nor games, nor books, nor sleep...
Finally, after what seems to be a decade of torture and torment to me have ended. To all my friends out there, I would like to shout: “I’m FREE!!”
During this past year, many events have taken place. So many, both enjoyable and sorrowful. I have managed to set myself free of this chain that’s been around my heart since the day I cuffed them in myself. For as long as I remembered, this chain has been remained locked and the only key to opening it have been swollen.
But not any more. I have dissected my stomach and grabbed the bloody key out of it. I have removed the unbearable chain of tragic. Leaving back the pain and heart aches to the past. Something to remember of and not bring forward to the present nor future. For many of those around me who have suffered and have not been able to mix well with me, I’m apologize deeply. Sincerely.
I know that somewhere around this year, I was introduced to a bunch of new friends. A group of young broodlings who were younger than me by 3 years. They were a friend of a friend. We did not connect well then. Everything lasted about a month. Now we’ve distanced apart.
That was then. And will be in the present and future. Ever since all the pain and tears I have caused among a few people which I have regretted, I concluded to chain my heart, never get too close with anyone. To protect each other’s feelings. To prevent myself from getting deeper in the Labyrinth of Sorrow. I have chosen a path that leads to a habit, a life which is far different from what I used to be.
Those that were close with me, I still treat them with love and care. These are the people which have been proven difficult to let go. For those that I just got to know, I’m sorry for being such a pariah. At times I feel incongruous. Even to a group of neighbourhood friends whom I’ve just known about a year ago. I used to play catching with them then. As zany as I used to be, I had fun. Now, I’d just sit on the swing, enjoy watching them run around like dogs playing with each other while I listen to my music.
Music, the one other solution to my problems in life. Whenever I was down, or needed a rest, I would plug those earphones in my ears and expunge every other noise around me. It was a way of escaping my problems. I still do it now.
Nevertheless, I remained forlorn. It was arduous trying to pick up or start a conversation with my new found friends. Slowly, I effaced most of my emotions towards certain people. I don’t like getting too attached. The closer you are, the more hurtful it gets. I have to elucidate that this was the past. Not much has changed now, but I have taken a step out of the Labyrinth.
I have started making amends for all the cajoles I have made. One by one, I try to catch up with my friends’ lives for being obsolete. To find out what I have missed out and not teased them about. To try to communicate with them. They think I’m crass. But I know what I really want.
There have been friends which I have ever and always enjoyed their company. An exchange of vulgar words in everyday conversations could never debilitate our friendship. They have accompanied me through rough times, whether they know or not. And I thank them for this.
Please give me some time and condone me of all my mistakes and my personality in the past. I’ll try to be more garrulous and intemperate. Just for a little fun.. ^^ At times, you may think I’m peerless, but if you looked deeper, I’m one who is willing to improve on comments and expectations. And never will I perfidy the trust of anyone. Never.
At last. I’ve reached cloud 9.
At last, I am forgiven…
